Introvert or Extrovert?

Photo by Gonard Fluit on Unsplash

I’ve always tended towards being an introvert.

I do love getting together with my friends. I enjoy going out on occasion. But I was never a big “let’s go to the noisy crowded bar” type of girl. I did it, but it was never my thing. My thing was to hang out at the beach and watch the waves while reading a book.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more of an introvert, or as I like to call it, more discerning with how I choose to spend my time.

I used to be afraid to refuse an invitation. I worried that I either wouldn’t be asked again or that my friends would be mad at me for not going. I wound up going to a lot of events that I really would have rather not gone to. I figured that there was something wrong with me that I didn’t want to go, so I forced myself to go. I chalked it up to trying not to be a party pooper (which I was actually called once).

Now when I think about it, it makes me a little sad. Sad that I didn’t have enough courage to bow out and be ok with it. What is it that makes women so willing to put what they want last and do for others instead when they hate every minute of it?

That’s all changed now. I have no problem saying no. And I don’t even give reasons. It’s just no. Period. I don’t owe anyone any explanations about how I choose to spend my time, or not. I feel like it was a long road to get here, but I am thrilled that I did.

So I’ll see you later.

Or maybe not.